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<title>End Me {Song Fic} by Kacychase</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23276269">End Me {Song Fic}</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kacychase/pseuds/Kacychase'>Kacychase</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>I Love Yoo (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 09:01:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>881</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23276269</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kacychase/pseuds/Kacychase</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This song fic includes Billie Eilish's "Bury a Friend" :)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>End Me {Song Fic}</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="center">
  <strong>~---  CONTAINS SUICIDAL  BEHAVIOUR AND THOUGHTS---~</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Huh.  Here I  am. Trapped in life. Tied to this punching bag. Hitting my thoughts out.</p><p> </p><p>Listening to that one song over and over and over again.  Not giving a f*ck about the environment anymore.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>What do you want from me?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>People should stop.  They should leave me alone. Why are all those people here? Yui. Kousuke.  Father. Every single damned person  of the high class. But, there are you…</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Why  don't you  run from me?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>They  already  got me here.  They already made  me theirs, a deformed  monster. Don’t be fooled.  My friends… Why do I even  have friends? They should leave  me behind. For their own sakes… Shin-Ae,  Dieter, Soushi. Just run.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>What  are you wondering?  What do you know?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Shin-Ae.  You look at  me weirdly and  we just became friends.  How come? You seem to be  aware. Your looks are getting  through my wall, you don’t know…  But at the same time you do. How  do you do that?</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Why  aren't you  scared of me?  Why do you care  for me?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Stop,  Shin-Ae.  You don’t  need to do  this. The way  you care for me  will destroy you. It  will be in vain. Please,  wake up. Watch out.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>When  we all fall  asleep, where do  we go?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>What  would happen  then? People say  that dreams would show  what your subconscious is  expressing. I can’t help but  wonder what others might think.  I don’t even care about mine. I  know what it says.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Come  here</em>
</p><p> </p><p>I  want  to help  her.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Say  it, spit  it out, what  is it exactly</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Shin-Ae  seems like  she’s in trouble,  always, and no one  is able to even observe  her behaviour.  But  it's  not  only  her.  It's  also  Alyssa.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>You're  payin'? Is  the amount cleanin'  you out, am I satisfactory?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Can  I even  do that?  Help her? Maybe  it’s useless. Maybe  I’m just a failure, it  wouldn’t be anything new.  Possibly, I’m just a way for  her to be reminded of what plagues  them.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Today,  I'm thinkin'  about the things  that are deadly</em>
</p><p> </p><p>I  should  stop that.  No. I don’t  want to. What  was all those years  of fighting against all  these people worth then? I  made it so far. I got so far  in my life, even with all these  failures… Except that no. I didn’t.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>The  way I'm  drinkin' you  down</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>Like  I wanna drown,  like I wanna end  me</em>
</p><p> </p><p>It’s  not like  I want to,  right? I don’t  want to get dragged  down by theses thoughts,  or this certain thing that  is getting my self-esteem lower  and lower every day. I know I can  not hold out for long but… I am not  using Shin-Ae while I try to help her,  do I?</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Step  on the glass,  staple your tongue</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Oh  how well  I know this  line. It’s like  my whole parental  relationship all over  again.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Bury  a friend,  try to wake  up</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Bury  a friend…  Maybe that’s  me. Maybe, the  formal did it’s job  in showing that I only  worsen things. I make things  break and I make things fail.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Cannibal  class, killing  the son</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Killing…  What a strong  word. It’s always  a strong word, yet  soft enough to think  of it as a sweet dream.  As long as it’s no reality,  my friends would be fine with  it.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Bury  a friend,  I wanna end  me</em>
</p><p> </p><p>At  this  point of  the song, this  is where I should  stop listening. I should  stop.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>I  wanna end  me</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Stop.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>I  wanna,  I wanna,  I wanna end  me</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>I  wanna,  I wanna,  I wanna</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>What  do you want  from me? Why don't  you run from me?</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>What  are you wondering?  What do you know?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>I’m  sure someone  knows. I’m sure  at least one of my  friends knows of this,  of me. Of this awful weakness.</p><p> </p><p class="italic">
  <em>Why  aren't you  scared of me?  Why do you care  for me?</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>When  we all fall  asleep, where do  we go?</em>
</p><p class="italic">
  <em>Listen</em>
</p><p> </p><p>By  now,  I have  thrown my  headphones off  and completely gone  on it. Two, three, four  lower punches, then a lower  punch and even a kick. I don’t  want to be anymore. The worst thing  of listening and being addicted to this  song is the fact that it pulls at me.</p><p> </p><p>That  I actually  want to end  me.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeong-Gi?”</p><p class="center">.</p><p class="center">.</p><p class="center">.</p><p class="center">.</p><p class="center">.</p><p>As  Soushi  and Dieter  watch the tombstone,  they can’t even measure  the impact that it has on  them.</p><p class="italic center">Here  lies</p><p class="italic center">Nolan  Ayers-Oliver Turlough-Lance  Lochlainn</p><p class="italic center">†December  21, 2019</p><p> </p><p>“Yeong-Gi  was not his  real name?” Dieter’s  question still arrived  through his quivery voice.  His shivering couldn’t recede  even if the German wanted to.  “No”, Soushi replied, his voice monotonous  and rock-solid, as if he wasn’t dying inside.  Yeong-Gi and him had shared the most. And it had  been amazing to have such a supportive friend. But now,  surroundings got the better of him. “I gotta tell you the  story later”, he quickly commented as he threw one last glance  at the real catalyst. The one who caused all of this.</p><p>Yui.</p><p> </p><p class="italic center">
  <em>What  do you  want from  me? Why don't  you run from me?</em>
</p><p class="italic center">
  <em>What  are you wondering?  What do you know?</em>
</p><p class="italic center">
  <em>Why  aren't you  scared of me?  Why do you care  for me?</em>
</p><p class="italic center">
  <em>When  we all fall  asleep, where do  we go?</em>
</p><p> </p><p class="italic center bolder">
  <strong>Careful.</strong>
</p>
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